Perfecting Ourselves

Parshat Nitzavim VAYELEKH

by Rabbi Avi Billet

In our efforts to get closer to God in the days leading up to Rosh Hashana, every person employs a different strategy.

            

Some learn the laws of Rosh Hashana, some give more charity, some pray more fervently or sincerely, Sefardim pray Selichot for a month, we hear the Shofar sound on a daily basis. People are a little nicer to one another. We give High Holiday greetings (K'tivah Va'Chatimah Tovah – May you be Inscribed and Sealed for a Good Year), send Rosh Hashana cards, and try to make a good showing as the clock ticks towards the moment of truth.

            

Is there a unique instruction that can help us maintain our focus?

            

Sometimes a Hassidic thought nails the idea perfectly.

            

The last verse in our double parsha brings Moshe's efforts of chapter 29-31 to a close when it declares, "And Moshe spoke the words of this song into the ears of the congregation of Israel, until it was completed."

            

The term "until it was completed" is the most likely translation of the two Hebrew words, "Ad tumam" referring to the completion of the song Moshe was telling over. The dangling modifier allows for the possibility that "ad tumam" refers to the Israelites, that Moshe spoke to them, until they were finished or completed.

            

It was Rabbi Simcha Bunem of Pshischa who went in this direction – not suggesting the people were finished but that they achieved the meaning of the root word "tumam."

            

Essentially, he suggests that Moshe repeated the song over and over and over again until the people achieved becoming "Tamim" – complete or perfect.

            

This is the lesson we must carry for ourselves at this time of year.

            

What will it take for the message of Godliness to penetrate our minds and hearts? How will we be able to answer for ourselves that we put in our greatest effort?

            

If we heed the message because we have listened to it over and over. If we can only read through the Rosh Hashana prayers in advance, to familiarize ourselves with them, and to have their impact be felt in our hearts, we may be moved to become more wholesome human beings. If we can hear a message of "Shuva" – "Return to God" over and over, it might be effective.

            

According to R' Simcha Bunem, Moshe did not give up with the Jewish people. He plugged away with them, because of his concern for the direction they'd choose after his demise. He never felt they were ready for him to leave them.

            

But here, in this final verse of our parsha, Moshe achieved his goal. "Moses then proclaimed the words of this song to the entire assembly of Israel until they became complete and perfect."

            

His efforts to help the people change their essence and their totality proved successful. Because reviewing the points they needed to hear helped the right ideas penetrate so they could become the complete nation he could feel comfortable leaving with his successor.

            

May we be so lucky to find the message that speaks to us, dedicate ourselves to listen to it over and over, so we may be able to perfect and complete ourselves in our continued effort of improving ourselves in the service of God and in our fellowship with Man.

Putting On A Good Face

Parshat Vayelekh

by Rabbi Avi Billet

One of the earlier verses in the parsha describes the encouragement Moshe gave to Yehoshua in the last days before passing the baton of leadership to him.

"Moses summoned Joshua, and in the presence of all Israel, said to him, 'Be strong and brave, since you will be the one to bring this nation to the land that God swore to their fathers that He would give it to them. You will be the one to parcel it out to them." [Rabbi Aryeh Kaplan's translation – Living Torah]

Rabbi Kaplan's translation is generally a loose one, as he moves Hebrew phrases around in the English in order to create a more flowing narrative. Any translator knows something is lost in the change from one language to the next. The challenge is to stay as true to the original as one can, while making it an appealing read to your target audience.

In this particular case, while I believe Rabbi Kaplan's interpretation is accurate in the sentiment, the inaccuracy of the order of the translation removes the possibility of understanding how the teaching shared by the Slonimer Rebbe in his Nesivos Shalom fits in the text. A literal translation of the beginning of the verse will sound more like, "And Moshe said to him, before the eyes of all of Israel, 'Be strong and brave…'"

In his classic Hassidic style of reassigning modifiers, the Nesivos Shalom suggests that we view Moshe's quote as beginning after the words "to him." This may even be a better interpretation than the one suggested by Rabbi Kaplan, when we consider the cantillation marks on the words, as well as the fact that what Moshe is telling Yehoshua is quite personal. We know from past experiences (read: spies) that telling personal and private messages to individuals in front of the entire nation has not boded well when the ax fell.

Yehoshua was faced with a personal dilemma. He was the same Yehoshua he had always been. "Yehoshua bin Nun, the young man, would not leave from the tent." (Shmot 33:11) He was studious, dedicated to his teacher, and not interested in attention. He did not crave the limelight. He learned from his teacher to be humble and to know your place.

And so the Nesivos Shalom suggests, Moshe was telling him, "You are the leader now, whether you like it or not. God chose you! So at least when you are 'before the eyes of all of Israel, be strong and brave.' Be the king! Be the leader! Hide your reservations and your feelings of insecurity when you are in front of the people. You are their leader."

If Yehoshua wanted to cry himself to sleep at night, he could do that in the privacy of his own bedroom. But as a leader, he must present a face of leadership at all times.

Some people have either worked on or are blessed with a tremendous amount of confidence. The confidence may be well deserved or earned. And sometimes the confidence translates to getting too much undeserved attention.

On the other hand, there are some people who are quite capable but are quite reserved or insecure about their abilities, or feel that if they do one thing incorrectly, it will ruin everything and they'll never get a second chance.

A healthy balance uses both traits. It is very important to make mistakes, as long as one learns from them. It is very important to showcase one's talents, when one has talents worth showcasing – even if you personally don't put much stock in them. There are athletes who hate watching sports, and actors who can't stand to watch theater or film. But they do what they do because they are good at it. And if they don't put on the right face when they do it, they might not continue to enjoy the success they enjoy.

Part of the task is to, as Nike puts it, "Just do it." The other part of the task is to put on a good face, and to be confident in what you are doing.

No one can solve my personal devils and distractions except me. This is true for every person who carries emotional baggage.

Moshe was saying to Yehoshua, "God will help you with your personal issues. Don't wear your emotions on your sleeve for all of Israel to see. You may only exhibit leadership qualities before them. And then, if you need to, collapse on your bed in private at the end of the day."

This is particularly a challenge for parents who are looked up to by their children. For those who struggle with bills, debt, financial uncertainty, or whatever else, putting a up a good front for one's children is a difficult assignment. Stress can be quite deflating, and it can bring down those who are incapable of coping.

As we make our commitments to TEshuva in this time period, may we also pray that God can give us the strength to pull it all together, hold it all together, and always put a good face forward as we interact with those who look to us as their models and leaders.

Be Brave and Strong! The best is yet to come.

Going When It's Time

Parshat Nitzavim Vayelekh

by Rabbi Avi Billet

Moshe's good bye speech that is the book of Devarim contains a number of references to the fact that he will not accompany the people into the Promised Land. He talks about how he requested, knelt, pleaded before God to be given a chance to enter the land – if only for a short time – and how each request was summarily rejected.

In the beginning of Devarim, Moshe pins the reason on the event of the spies (1:37). Sometimes, the reasoning becomes more of God's design than a mundane punishment. The Or HaChaim (1:37) quotes a gemara (Sotah 9a) and the Midrash Tehillim (79) to explain how Moshe's non-entry into the land was part of a plan that would ultimately save the Jewish people. Had Moshe entered the land, he would have built the Temple, which God would never allow to be destroyed.

God's ensuing wrath over the people turning from Him was taken out on wood and stones (the destruction of the Temple), rather than against the Israelite nation.

In his work Siftei Tzadikim, Rabbi Menachem Mendel of Rimanov says that Moshe, the ultimate shepherd of Israel, fulfilled his destiny particularly in his death, through granting Israel an everlasting chance at eternal survival.

To bring the matter to an even more direct level, the Mareh Yechezkel (Rabbi Yechezkel Panet) gives two additional explanations for why Moshe needed to remain outside of the land: for the merit of those who perished in the wilderness, and to serve as a defense against the prosecution of Baal Peor, which would not be able to stand up against Moshe's grave, is in the mountains of Moav, overlooking the place where the negative incident of Bamidbar 25 took place.

In our parsha, Moshe says "Today I am 120 years old and I can no longer come and go. God has [also] told me that I would not cross the Jordan." (31:2)

What does Moshe mean when he says "I can no longer come and go?" Is Moshe referring to his physical prowess? Is Moshe referring to the reality that the end of his life has arrived? Is Moshe saying that he can no longer argue the point with God because it is hopeless for him to enter the land?

Ibn Ezra suggests Moshe could no longer lead the people in battle. Rashi rejects the idea that Moshe's physical strength was ebbing, as he offers Moshe's inability (permission-wise) to enter the land, and that Moshe was no longer capable of deep Torah thoughts. (Ramban prefers this latter interpretation.) Different Tosafists point to Moshe's old age as his reason for not being able to continue – following the logical flow of the verse. The Seforno has echoes of Moshe's destiny when he says "Even if I could physically make the trip (go and come), since God said I can not go, it will be better for you if I do not enter, because this will allow you to pass over the Jordan River, and to enter the promised Land."

There are no set rules for when the body begins to break down. Some people might begin experiencing debilitating ailments or conditions at an early age, some at a later stage, and some go through life as healthy as can be past becoming centenarians.

The big challenge for many of us is how to deal with the cards we're dealt. For Moshe, the Torah says he did not lose his physical strength. But there is room to look at Moshe not being able to lead a battle or to not maintain his highest intellectual capacity – especially after he anointed Yehoshua his successor and gave Yehoshua some of his own "glory."

Moshe grew to accept his reality and to understand that some things, which are clearly part of God's master plan, are what they are. No amount of Moshe's pleading could change his destiny once the decree was given.

Does this mean Moshe did not possess Free Will, and that perhaps his destiny was predetermined? Of course not. Moshe demonstrated his free will many times in the Torah, and his destiny was heavily influenced by his free will choices.

The reality presented by the verse also suggests, however, that Moshe was able to recognize when his time was up, so he could walk off into the sunset while still as close to the top of his game as he could possible be.

May we all be blessed to live to Moshe's ripe old age, and merit to appreciate our final days for what they will be: the prelude to our reunion with the divine.

Hypocritical Thinking

This also appears in the Jewish Star

Parshat Nitzavim-Vayelech

Repentance: heart and soul

By Rabbi Avi Billet

This Saturday night, the Ashkenazic communities begin to say Selichot in preparation for Rosh Hashana. Sephardim have been saying them since Rosh Chodesh Elul. I’ll never forget the first night of Selichot in my yeshiva in Israel, when Rav Yehuda Amital, z”l, who passed away less than two months ago, would lead the yeshiva in his unique style of presenting the traditional melodies.

I am sure I was not alone with the eerie sensation I’d feel up my spine as the hairs on the neck would stand up as the collective voice of the students of the yeshiva filled with awe and trepidation as they responded to the kaddish.

It could be that yeshiva students go through the motions really well. And it could be that, as Israelis, the percentage of people who understood every word they were saying shattered the percentages of every group with whom I’d experienced selichot before that.

One could easily be inspired to feel the need to do “teshuvah” – literally to return to G-d as much as possible in the waning hours of the final days of the year leading into Rosh Hashana.

Our parsha speaks of the day when “You will return to G-d… with all your heart and with all your soul.” (30:2) This phrase is reminiscent of the commandment to love G-d with all your heart and soul (Devarim 6:5) as well as other similar commitments to G-d (4:29, 10:12, 26:16, 30:10). The commentaries talk about the greatness of teshuvah (repentance), mostly quoting the Talmud (Yoma 86a-b) which includes a number of qualities of teshuvah: “It brings healing to the world, it reaches the Throne of Glory, forgives violations, brings the redemption close, purposeful sins are judged like accidents (Resh Lakish says they are viewed as merits!), it lengthens a person’s days.”

The most simplistic way of looking at teshuvah is considering there are two ways one can sin: against G-d and against one’s fellow man. Teshuvah, therefore, consists of repairing those relationships and committing to do things that will indicate you are sticking with the promise of the new you.

I call this “hypocritical thinking.” I heard a story that the Gaon of Vilna would pay someone to tell him in what way he needs to improve. Who would otherwise criticize the Vilna Gaon?

Recognizing that we all need reminders now and then, and acknowledging that I am guilty of a number of these myself, here are a few questions for consideration, offered free of charge.

Are we careful to wash, but forget to bentch?

Are we careful to make sure there is a mashgiach in a kosher restaurant? And then do we allow ourselves to eat a soup or salad in a non-kosher restaurant – where there is surely no mashgiach?

Do we admonish others who say lashon hara about us? But don’t admonish ourselves when we participate in similar conversations about others?

Do we raise our eyebrows at those who come late to shul, but don’t back it up with coming on time ourselves?

Do we facilitate growth in learning and spirituality – giving our spouses the chance to attend the classes they want to or need to attend?

Do we spend our spare time catching up on missed TV shows? Do we spend any spare time catching up on Torah study (parsha, daf yomi, halakha learning)?

Do we send our kids to yeshiva, complaining about tuition, and then make $50,000 bar mitzvah bashes, or six figure weddings?

Do we scream about modesty and the need to dress a certain way, and then forget about the same rules when they’re inconvenient for us? (The story of the woman with the bikini and the tichel on Miami Beach during Pesach vacation always struck me as ironic.)

Do we use the computer for learning and for business, but also for…?

Do we set aside time for learning once a week? Do we set aside time for poker once a week? Do we learn and play poker together within the same hour and a half? (Perhaps there are merits. On the other hand, maybe Talmud and poker are contradictory to one another.)

A thought for all the roshei yeshiva and rabbis – can we learn to say things that are permitted and to teach the “way we do things” as opposed to focusing on all the things that are “assur,” prohibited?

Do we judge people favorably, giving them the benefit of the doubt? Or do we focus on their negative qualities and make all kinds of assumptions about them?

Do we honor and respect our children as much as we expect them to honor and respect us?

Living a purely honorable existence is near-impossible. Never doing anything wrong is impossible. But we ought to give it the best shot we can. As human beings, we are capable of more; we are capable of being better. We are capable of living to the beat of a more consistent drum.

Let us take these thoughts to mind and heart, and commit to doing teshuva, with all our heart and with all our soul.