You Go, and You Go Too

Parshat Vaychi

by Rabbi Avi Billet

Yosef is sworn to bury Yaakov in the land of Canaan at the very beginning of the Torah portion. (47:29-30) After he blesses his sons and gives them his final messages, Yaakov instructs all of his sons to bury him in the Me’arat Hamachpela, the burial plot where his wife, parents and grandparents are buried. (49:29-32)

                

With the promise of Yosef, second in command of Egypt, that he’ll be buried in the family plot in Canaan, why does he feel the need to instruct his sons as well?

                

Ramban posits that Yaakov was concerned that Yosef would not be given permission to go due to his position.

                

As it turns out, after his father dies, Yosef seems unable to speak with Pharaoh directly, to get the permission needed to go. He appeals to “Beit Paroh” (the Household of Pharaoh), asking them to beseech the king, on account of the promise he made to his father.

                

Pharaoh’s response is telling; “Go up and bury your father, to fulfill that which he made you swear," he says, suggesting, as many note, that without the promise, it is questionable whether that permission would have been granted. 

                

More simply, Ibn Ezra explains that he was merely commanding his sons to accompany Yosef. He doesn’t ask for any response from them and he doesn’t get any response from them. He essentially commands them, and then he dies.

                

Along similar lines, Or HaChaim says, “He didn’t want them to think that he only obligated Yosef alone to accompany him to burial, and so he commanded all of them to be involved. He didn’t need to have them swear, because they will all fulfill his word.”

                

These answers are satisfactory on one level, but when we consider the concern the brothers seemed to have for Yaakov when Binyamin was in trouble at the end of Parshat Miketz and in last week’s parsha, wouldn’t it seem obvious that they’d all want to go to their father’s funeral?

                

Clearly Yaakov was not convinced that they’d all want to go. Yosef may have needed an oath to grant him leave from his position, but what was tying the brothers to Egypt that Yaakov felt would hold them back from participating in his funeral were it not for his dying wish that they accompany his body on its final journey?

                

The brothers obviously had no political roles which prevented them from leaving. Were that the case, Yaakov would have had to make them swear as well. So what did it – what caused Yaakov to need to give his sons instructions to go?

                

The only things that have demonstrably changed since last week’s parsha are that the family has moved to Egypt (and all that comes with adjusting to a new location, culture, and society), Yosef has been reintroduced to the family life, Yaakov has started to play favorites again (see how he has claimed Ephraim and Menashe as replacements for Reuven and Shimon), and he has given his sons his last will and blessings.

                

Maybe they loved Egypt so much. On the other hand, maybe the uprooting, the favoring Yosef and his children, and the (in some cases) not-exactly blessings caused the old animosities to creep back into the family. We know Yaakov spent the first 17 years of Yosef’s life favoring Yosef, and now we see he spent the last 17 years of his own life favoring Yosef once again.

                

Maybe, in the heat of the final moments, between the blessings that may have been misunderstood (or understood all too well) along with the thought that “Our brothers will go. What’s the big deal if a couple of us stay behind?” – after all, it’s a long journey, a long time to leave the wives and children alone, and without Yosef’s protection – maybe some were feeling not so close to Yaakov. Maybe they felt, “I put in my time taking care of the old man. I’m done. I’ll sit shiva, but I won’t make the trek to Canaan.”

                

Yaakov was teaching his sons that a father is a father. And that no matter what you’re thinking, no matter what baggage you carry, no matter how much you like or don’t like your father’s final message – you still have to honor your father in his final journey.

                

Life has its challenges. Hopefully when it ends for the loved ones in our lives – after 120 years! – we will be able to put any negativity behind us, and embrace our responsibilities to care for the dead, and be there for their final journey*, wherever they are to be buried. 

* (Personal health and financial circumstances notwithstanding, of course)

"Put the Money in Their Bags"

A great "Yosef" - Rabbi Joseph Grunblatt - passed away last Shabbos. His funeral took place on Sunday and the hespedim are available for viewing here. His passing is a true loss to the Jewish people. An incredible rabbi, talmid chochom, humble and magnanimous. תנצבה.

Parshat Miketz

by Rabbi Avi Billet

Book collectors often have many books on their shelves that never move from their place. But sometimes it is the thin volume you never look at that contains gems of insight and wisdom.

            

In recent years I have found this to be true of a book I purchased when I was in yeshiva. The author is Yeshayahu Moleyoff (not sure how that is spelled in English), and it is one volume on Bereshit – I don't even know if he has more – called "Meotzarot Bereshit." The book seems to be self-published.

            

He asks the following question: Why did Yosef give the money back to his brothers both times they purchased food?

            

For a very long time I thought Yosef was underhandedly doing what anyone in his position would likely do for family. "I don't need your money. Please. It's on me." Because even if Yosef didn't want to reveal himself until he had uncovered what he needed to find out about them, perhaps he did not feel the need to overburden his father financially when he (Yosef) didn't need the money, and presumably, particularly on account of the famine, his father needed every penny he had.

            

The question can be strengthened when we consider that most commentaries who address this issue focus on the "how" and not the "why." He put the money in – perhaps by displacing some food, forcing them to come back sooner. He put the money in the bottom of all bags, except for Levi's, in whose bag the money was placed on top. Levi, after all, was lost without Shimon, his partner in crime, and any feeling of fear over discovering the money would be felt by Levi first. This is by design.

            

Of course, these two approaches - to return the money graciously versus to "get them" - contradict one another, and Yeshayahu Moleyeff notes that even if Yosef had the first thought in mind (to kindly return the money he did not need) there is no way he did not anticipate the kind of reaction his brothers had: they would be fearful and feel something afoul over discovering the money they thought they had paid back in their bags.

            

He therefore suggests that Yosef was trying to deliver a subtle message to the brothers both times. First when they had lost Shimon, and when they were going to get Binyamin. And second, when Binyamin's bag was set up as the guilty one containing Yosef's cup.

            

That message was one of "Midah k'neged midah" – measure for measure.

            

They had received money over the purchase of Yosef as a slave, and they were now receiving money when Shimon was left behind as a slave and when the signs were pointing to the possibility that Binyamin might become a slave as well.

            

More poignantly, if things did not pan out well, they were all on the brink of becoming slaves themselves. They come to this recognition themselves in 43:18 and even offer themselves as slaves at the end of the parsha, when Yosef threatens to take Binyamin as a slave.

            

Midah K'neged Midah, therefore, is the running theme here. Yosef is not looking to make his brothers slaves. It is enough that he has seen them bow (in fulfillment of his dreams), that he knows the power he holds, and that they are willingly accepting his kingship over them. It is only that he wants to see how they will react when the circumstances themselves are set up all over again. When they see money being handed to them in exchange for their efforts to bring Binyamin down to Egypt. When they see money being handed to them when Binyamin is being set up to be arrested for stealing from the king.

            

In 42:21 they lamented not that they had sold Yosef – they still thought they were in the right in doing so. (This is a much longer discussion.) But they lamented how they had ignored his screams, and had dealt with him coldly.

            

In essence, Yosef set the stage as best he could to mirror what had taken place 22 years earlier. A young, innocent, son of Rachel was going to be placed in the precarious brink of becoming a slave to Egypt forever. The money has been exchanged, the boy is helpless and guilty in the eyes of those judging him, and it is up to the brothers to demonstrate compassion. To look out for their brother. To do everything within their power and then some to make sure history doesn't repeat itself.

            

This is the mark of a true baal teshuvah. When the circumstances lend themselves for the bad action to be repeated, and the former sinner chooses a different path, he is considered penitent.

            

Yosef HaTzaddik was using God's favorite form of punishment – measure for measure. And with the brothers' collective action, and Yehuda – who was most responsible for the idea of the sale – standing up to do everything in his power to defend Binyamin (in next week's parsha), we see how the brothers are ready to be reunited, and the next stage of their collective history can finally commence with the reunions that will take place when Yaakov and his greater family come down to Egypt.

p.s. We can take this thought and apply it to the Hanukkah experience as well. The Greek occupation and the influence they exerted over the people of ancient Israel could only be overcome when the Jewish people were put in touch with the conflicting ideology, coming to the conclusion that Judaism was and will always be the best thing for the Jews.

Just as Yosef remains a highlight of the Israelites' time in Egypt, the 200+ years Hasmonean dynasty is a highlight of the Jewish experience in Israel during a time of foreign occupation and the 2000 year exile that has followed since the destruction of the Temple.

           

The First Conspiracy Theory

Parshat Vayeshev

by Rabbi Avi Billet

Yosef is sent by his father to Shechem, with a few tasks. Rabbi Mordechai Breuer divided Yosef's mission: you are being sent to your brothers, see how they are, see how the sheep are, and return to me with the update.

            

Ironically, as his brothers are no longer in Shechem only the first is partially achieved, and Yosef never returns after he is sold to Egypt. Malbim and Rashbam credit Yosef for seeking them beyond Shechem – above the call of duty – because shepherds tend to wander. Yaakov had made Yosef a "shaliach l'dvar mitzvah" – an agent for fulfilling a mitzvah – which would protect him in both directions.

Or Hachaim and Beit Halevi note that once he went to Dotan he was no longer under the protection of his father's command, and that is where the story turned sour for him.

            

Rabbi Breuer suggests that Shechem was not on the same crossroad that would have allowed the brothers to see the traveling caravans, so their location shift was not accidental, as it meant to set the stage for the national sojourn to Egypt to begin.

            

After arriving in Shechem, Yosef is found by a "man" who notices him lost in a field. The man tells him he heard the brothers saying "We shall go to Dotan." Most people assume that Dotan is a geographical location a short distance from Shechem (see Rashbam 37:17). But Rashi (37:17) raises the possibility, using a play on words, that they went "to seek against you [Yosef] conspiracies of legal pretexts" through which they can put you to death. In other words, as Rabbi Yoel Bin Nun argues, Yosef's perspective may eventually become that this was all a setup – a conspiracy against him.

            

What is the significance of Shechem, Dotan, the field and the 'man' who finds him?

Many commentaries note that Shechem is a place set aside for difficult stories: Dinah, sale of Yosef, the splitting of the kingdoms of Israel, and a place of murderers (see Hoshea 6:9). If so, Yaakov sending Yosef there would seem to be a sample of poor judgment.

            

Whether Yaakov thought out all the details is questionable. The Pesikta argues that for many years his calling Yosef, who said "Hineni" – "I am here, ready to take your mission upon myself," weighed very heavily on Yaakov, who felt responsible for Yosef's fate.

There are different possibilities for why the brothers were in Shechem. Maybe for a macho reason – they wanted to prove their independence and that they had no fear of repercussions from the massacre (Radak). Or they were following the journey of Avraham – which caused Yaakov to believe they had feelings of love for one another, as did their great grandfather Avraham (Shakh). Or they had put themselves in a situation to avoid their father sending Yosef – after all, it was a dangerous place (Malbim). On the other hand, if Yaakov did send Yosef to join them, Yosef's death could surely be attributed to or blamed on any of the locals who had it in for Yaakov's family, especially a simple target traveling alone.

            

Yaakov sent Yosef to them for different possible reasons as well. The Hadar Zekenim anthology posits that Yaakov mulled over the "Safek" (doubt) he had as to whether the brothers might harm Yosef, versus the "Vadai" (surety) that the people of Shechem (or their inheritors) will kill all of them if they are found there (see Targum Yonatan). Better to take the Safek, that something may or may not happen to Yosef, over the Vadai, that all of his shepherding sons will be killed. Radak opines, though, that on the one hand "Yisrael" (the name of innocence used to give Yosef the task) was completely unaware of the feelings the brothers had for Yosef (Alshikh), while on the other hands, he may have been aware but took Yosef's innocence regarding his brothers to mean the brothers had no ill feelings (Malbim).

            

Another line of thinking is that Yaakov or Yosef were aware that on this day the journey to Egypt would begin (Yonatan). The question was which family member would go down first?

            

The underlying theme of God's mighty hand assuring all goes according to the plan as promised to Avraham is not missed by Radak. Even the fact that Yisrael sent Yosef from "Emek Chevron" is enough of a hint to this idea. Chevron, after all, is on a mountain. An Emek is a valley – lending it to be interpreted metaphorically, as the "emek" – depth of Chevron, the city that sounds like "Chaver" – friend. This promise was made to the "Chaver" of Chevron (Avraham), buried in the depths – that his children will be strangers in a strange land. (Shakh) [Though Bal Haturim suggest the word Emek numerically equals 210, adding to the allure of the connection between the Emek and the 210 year exile to Egypt.]

            

We are told Yosef is "Toeh" in the field. The spelling does not mean "making errors" (טועה) and it is likely that the word means "Lost." The word Basadeh (as opposed to "B'sadeh") refers to a specific field, as opposed to a random field.

            

What was he lost about? And what specific field is this referring to?

Kli Yakar quotes the Midrash that he was "mistaken" regarding the field. He should have been aware of Kayin and Hevel and what happened when brothers who have an altercation meet in the field.

            

The Alshikh also says he was mistaken regarding the field, but about the meaning of the field in his dream. To Yosef, the dream about the bundles was saying, "I will go to the fields where they are and they'll bow to me. Will they be able to cancel out what God has told me will happen?"

So the "man"/angel was there to remove the "Toeh" from his heart – that he shouldn't believe in his dream [at this point]. Even if it is true, you can't take away their choice – and they will not choose to bow to you. If all you're going to do is incite jealousy, they will not respond positively, and your dream will never come true.

Had the angel not come, Yosef would have stayed with his pride against them, and they would have killed him.

            

There are plenty of indications that the brothers were not all lovey as Yosef may have assumed or liked to believe. Whether it is the extra Yud in Dotayna (they were ten brothers united, minus the sons of Rachel), or the message to Yosef that they had traveled from "Zeh" (ויסעו מזה) (Zeh = 12, literally "this" but they have moved from the unity of being twelve brothers – you are out), the Alshikh argues Yosef was a goner before he even shows up. This is why Malbim claims Yaakov's sending him to them (when they felt that way) nonetheless was criminal enough that Yaakov was worthy to be sent down to Egypt in chains. Sending Yosef down first was done for Yaakov's honor so that he came to Egypt royally.

            

The overall picture of this scene leads us to appreciate the depth of the tale – much more than just a string of coincidences. Or a family-made conspiracy theory. This was all part of a divine plan, to send the nation to Egypt, with Yosef paving the way, filling the promise made to Avraham that his children will be strangers in a strange land. 

Yosef's Strategy: Family, Not Dreams

Parshat Miketz

by Rabbi Avi Billet

There are many ways to analyze Yosef's strategy with his brothers – what was his intent, his plan, and his goal in having them go through all the "tzurres" he gave them over their younger brother and their father. The superlatives run from "cruel" to "brilliant" and from "vindictive" to "well thought out."

            

Ramban justifies all the suffering Yosef causes his father saying Binyamin needed to come without Yaakov for the first dream to be fulfilled.

But I don't understand the need for it at all. Yosef had two dreams – the first that "We were working in a field" when their bundles bowed to Yosef's bundle. He did not specify how many bundles bowed. The second dream was that the sun, moon and eleven stars bowed to Yosef.

            

As soon as his ten brothers come in, they bow. Yosef sees them and recognizes them. (42:6-7) It seems to me that the first dream has been fulfilled! There was never any indication that Binyamin's bowing is a necessity for the fulfillment of the dream! Furthermore, if the dream was like a prophesy, why would Yosef need to do anything to align things to happen the way he saw in his dream? God will take care of it!

            

If he wants to find out if his father and brother are alive – fine! Then he should ask that, reveal himself, and tell them to bring the family down because there will be a few more years of famine. But he doesn't even do that! He accuses them of being spies! Their response is that they are the sons of one man – therefore, not spies.

            

He repeats an accusation that "You've come to find where the land is exposed!" Rabbi Chaim Paltiel explains Yosef's comment, adding "If you were brothers you might have left someone home! Since you all came, it indicates you plan to attack us!" And their response is that "We are 12 brothers, the youngest is with our father today, and the other one is missing." And Yosef confirms, "This is what I was saying – You are spies!"

            

He never asked about Binyamin – they offered the information to prove their innocence.

            

If dream number one is fulfilled, all that’s needed is for the family to know that Yosef is alive and well, and that he is ruling in Egypt, and that he will take care of them as long as there is a famine – as long as they come down to Egypt. This takes place in 45:26-28.

When they all come down, "the sun, moon and eleven stars" will bow, and Yosef's second dream will be fulfilled. Three chapters in the Torah don't need to happen.

There is a possibility that Yosef wanted to see how his brothers care for Binyamin. But does it really matter? By the time it's all over, Yosef says to his brothers "You did not send me here. God did…" (45:8) This indicates that Yosef is at peace with what happened, because it was meant to happen – it was the only way his dreams could be fulfilled – and he bears no ill will to his brothers. And if they have any problems with Binyamin, who has survived until now (to allow fulfillment of his second dream), they'll have no way to harm him because Yosef will protect him.

I think that all of Yosef's actions have nothing to do with the dreams. Sure, he remembers them, but they are from a bygone era, when he had a different life, when he was a young punk, with no experience, who had dreams of grandeur because of how he was favored by his father.

But those days are long gone. Ramban points out that Yosef never wrote a letter to his father, though he surely could have. Rav Yoel Bin Nun and Rav Yaakov Medan have debated in the pages of Megadim (periodicals of Herzog College in Israel) why Yosef chose the "non-communication" route. The question boils down to what was going through his head.

Once Yosef was in a position to communicate with his family on account of their unknowingly coming to him, all Yosef wanted was Binyamin: innocent Binyamin, his only full brother, the only one he felt he could trust. That was his end goal. When he says in the last verse of the parsha that Binyamin would stay while the rest could "go in peace to your father," he meant every word. How could he know what was coming next – Yehuda's appeal (the longest in the Torah) that made the entire ordeal about Yaakov's health?

When the brothers told Yosef, "We are twelve: one is home and one is missing" they used the word "Ei-neh-nu" (איננו) to describe Yosef's status. The word could mean missing, gone, or dead (see 5:24). Yosef understood it to mean "missing," which indicates no one cared about him in all the years he was gone. But the term, as used (see 37:30, 42:13,32,36, and then in 44:30-34) indicates a deep caring for one who is missing. What changes for Yosef is 44:28, when he hears for the first time that his father thinks he is dead - that Yosef misunderstood the word's meaning when it referred to how his father viewed him.

Was he vindictive? Was he justified? Everyone in the story learns a very profound lesson. The only way to treat family members is through living life with no regrets (42:21-22). Only when the family unit is 100% supportive of one another, and no individual or group ever makes rash decisions or gangs up on another does a family have a chance to survive, thrive, and move mountains.

May we be blessed to have extensive, unified families who do everything to build one another up, with respect and most importantly, with the right emotional support.